AUDITORY GEEK

In the meantime, all I can do is wait.
This is going to be a very very very long wait.

to whom it may concern

i dont usually rant but ive been hearing reports about people questioning why we played saguijo after the concert.

first things first. when marlboro pulled out and cancelled the show  week ago, the band was free of all obligation to play the show. if it was about the money we could have just walked away fully paid no explanations to the press or anybody. free from the contract. the band decided to play nevertheless. the tickets and the prices was for the new promoters to buy out the production from philip morris to put it simply. contrary to what some people think it takes money to stage a concert. stage, lights, and video screens don't magically grow out of the ground. that's what the ticket prices were for. the band was not in the negotiation meetings between the the two promoters and we did not want to be in the meetings.

personally i said just call me cos i'm ready to rock. no extra pay no contract negotiations. as far as the eheads was concerned were out of the contract.

but here's what you dont understand. playing music is what we do. we play when we're happy, play when we're sad, play when we're angry, play when we're sick, play til we die.

painters paint, writers write, my skateboarding friends skate or die, when u ask nba superstars what they do in their spare time. they play basketball. us musicians, we play. thats what we do. getting paid is a bonus. i will not apologize for that. when we don't get paid we still play.

we played saguijo because we wanted to, we needed to. our hearts and souls dictated it. we could just go home and sleep. we did not talk about it. there was no invites there was no plan. we did not get paid. we borrowed equipment.

yes ely knew about it. buddy told him the next day. yes pupil was in saguijo too.

yes marcus buddy and i have lost a parent. we know how it feels.

ive been playing music for more than 30 years. professionally since 1993.there have been a few times when it was me who was unable to continue the set due to illness. albeit it was a lesser scale and (thankfully) never reported. it was nonetheless life threatening. ive had a run in with losing my voice, food poisoning, diarreah (embarassing) and a few more i do not care to mention that involved blood and bones. i had to drop out of the set from the eheads, cambio and sandwich. thankfully there was always someone there to finish the set for me. and i am thankful that they were there. i did not feel bad. ive also saved a few shows from other bands when **** happens. we dont plan this and we dont complain but we still play.

my bmx friends ride with broken bones.

if we finished the eheads show that night you would STILL have found us in guijo playing after.

yes i visited ely in the hospital yesterday. i hope he recovers soon. we have a show to finish.

music is life
ill only stop playing when i die.

raym<s>

Part II

feel free to replace music with your own passion.

ever since grade 3 when i discovered the yamaha portable keyboard .i
never stopped playing music.and before that i played records on my
portable turntable.

before school, after school, summer and christmas breaks, when i was
alone, when i was with friends i found time to play music.

like all the kids in my street i played street games. i could kick
anybody's ass in sipa (betamax vid) i was good in tumbang preso but i
sucked at jolen.

in my little barrio, we played everything plus more (than the city
kids) we climbed trees, swam rivers, walked railroad tracks and rice
paddies, hiked hills , everything rural kids do.

there was also street basketball, bmx, breakdancing and girls.

in between all of this i always found time to play music.

i knew from that early age that it flowed in my veins.

so don't judge me when i want to play .

with or without an audience, with or without pay.

i play when i fall in love , when my heart gets broken. playing music
healed me when i lost my father. i played when my daughter was born.
(sandwich played baguio the next day).i wake up in the middle of the
night to record tracks in my undies. paradiddles help get me through
road rage.

it sounds corny but music really is my life and most of my friend's
lives.

i find it upsetting that i'm ranting and trying to defend myself from
insensitive people hiding under a pseudonym.

the next day after the concert i was still blue but i managed to
finish a remix for bagetsafonik.

today, to get myself out of a blue funk in bed. i worked on 9 tracks
for a hip hop project with rock ed.

last night. i skated with mong at the fort. i don't call myself a
skateboarder. i just cruise and try to pop some ollies but the real
skaters skate with swollen ankles, bruised wrists and (mong) murdered
toenails.

i bumped into them tonight after dinner. they were smiling and full of
life at midnight. not injured and defeated.

like me, they can't stop.

zappa said "shut up and play yer guitar"

raym<s>

Part III

make no mistake. i'm not shoving my music to everybody. in fact my
neighbors are probably tired of it haha. some of my closest friends
and family have no desire to listen to it. my daughter didn't even
know who the eraserheads were when teachers were asking about reunion
rumors. as far as she knows, the good thing about that big show was
trashing my hotel room with buddy and marcus' kids, the big swimming
pool and the air conditioned tents backstage.

if you like what you hear , thank you. if you don't, feel free to try
something else. i don't like anchovies myself.

i was admittedly hesitant about the first reunion. i was not sure if i
could handle the pressure and crap that came with it.

at this very moment. i'm actually thinking of doing it again. (when
ely gets well and strong of course)

i watched a kid fall after trying to kick flip a 7 step stairway in
u.p. he failed 5 times. but kept getting up. dusted himself . made
some adjustments until he finally nailed it. we all cheered and went
home smiling.

somehow i know how it feels.

Keep it alive, will ya?

c/o of faceyourmanga.com